So they already have Halloween candy on sale, I think I first saw it a few weeks ago actually. I haven’t lived in a community where the children trick or treat in years, and to tell you the truth I’m not sure I miss it.
I used to agonize over whether I should choose healthy treats or candy, or if I should get the good candy (that is amazingly expensive) or the less expensive mix with 5 different kinds of candy, but only 1 or 2 kinds that anyone actually likes (which is easier on the debit card).
Seeing some of my favorite seasonal candies appear on the shelves once again got me to thinking about how much of a hassle enjoying your favorite grown-up treats can be from time to time.
Do you have a personal treat that you LOVE and that help you keep your sanity?
For me it’s massages. I try to treat myself to a massage every four to six weeks. When I was in graduate school it was more often, usually every three weeks I’d get a 60 or 90 minute massage or when things were tight I’d do a 30 minute massage every other week until or 15 minute every week, until I could splurge on some longer time on the table.
The thing is, it wasn’t really a splurge in the true sense, due to health problems and some intense stress during my graduate program I had to be pretty vigilant about my bodywork (acupuncture and massage), as well as my eating (as organic and natural that my tight budget could get) and yoga regime.
Much of what we read or hear nowadays urges us to prioritize self-care. I agree that consistently neglecting to take care of yourself is never a good lifestyle choice. I truly believe that if you don’t take great care of yourself, you won’t have much of anything to give to those who depend on you. However, we may very well be taking the care of ourselves to seriously.
For instance, my last massage was about a week ago, before that it had been months. Part of the reason was that my husband and I had some other summer budget priorities so it moved farther down the list of things we wanted to spend money on. The other reason was because I had some other priorities shift in my life. For one, living as a newlywed and making new girlfriends in my new city.
I’m an early bird, so it was nothing for me before I got married to rise an hour and a half early, go get a massage, fall asleep on the table, treat myself to a great breakfast then start writing or prepping lesson plans with little interruption to my to-do list or deadlines. That isn’t the case anymore. I’d much rather snuggle in bed with the hubs until the last minute or get up and make a fun breakfast, that is when I don’t indulge in some sleeping in – my husband’s sweet sleep often compels me to sneak in a few more Z’s myself.
I’m also making new friends and meeting new folks in my new city. Although a spa day with old girlfriends is great, when I’m making new friends I prefer interactive activities like shopping, eating, going to festivals or talking about books or ideas or teaching or politics over bubble tea. That has left me very little time to lay on table for hours at a time getting kneaded or stuck with pins, even if it is for my own well-being.
Over the last month as I’ve settled more into a routine and carved out some stable “me” time I’ve found it harder than I thought it would be to schedule an appointment for a massage or acupuncture treatment. In the past I would have become obsessive about it. I would have scheduled something weeks or months in advance just to be sure that I could get in. By the time the weeks passed and it was time for the appointment I’d find that something else had come up and I couldn’t make the appointment, or that I forgot about the appointment completely.
Or I would call everyday trying to see if an appointment had opened in a slot that fit my schedule. I’d drive myself crazy! If this was any other task, say trying to get in touch with my insurance company or a customer service rep at my cell phone provider, I would feel inconvenienced to have to call every day just to see if I might be able to get what I need. Yet to give myself a treat I condoned this obsessive behavior.
We can inadvertently decrease our joy if we focus on treats that don’t fit our lives and our priorities. Even if it’s meant to be enjoyable, if something becomes a hassle it might be best to just stop. Treats, whether big or small, are meant to make life enjoyable – as frequently as possible.
What about you? Do you have something that you lie to do for yourself that has become a hassle? Have you considered finding another treat that isn’t so labor intensive?
Or maybe you’re the opposite altogether, and don’t go through any trouble to treat yourself. Is it because you haven’t found something you love as a treat? Or does the idea just seem ridiculous to you?
I’d love for you to share below in the comments or follow me, @busi_B on twitter.